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Comments

Dear Commenters:

If some of you are wondering why your comments on my last blog are still saying that are “awaiting moderation,” I would like to explain what and why that is.

What this means is that I, as the blog site operator, can “moderate” what comments are allowed and which ones aren’t. And why are you receiving this message? Here’s why.

I’m sick of it.

I truly am. I am sick of the bashing of a CHILD.

Now, I allowed many comments to go through that are against what I’m saying. That is fine…this is a highly controversial issue and I understand that many will not agree with me. You are welcome to your opinions, just as I am welcome to mine. Childhood sports is apparently a hot topic – a much hotter topic than I myself even realized. This blog has blown up. Am I sorry for that? Absolutely not. It’s a topic that needed to be discussed. Too many people sweep things under the rug and hope it goes away. I am not one of those people.

However, the comments from the people who actually know the parties involved – those are the ones that are really upsetting me. Why is that? Because they mention my son specifically. And the knowledge they have (or think they have) is only knowledge that would come within the school. Meaning: these are comments from faculty and staff of the high school. Comments that are BASHING a student.

I have a message for you. I know you used “fake names” and “anonymous” for most of your messages. But there’s this wee little thing about the WordPress site that you might not be aware of. When I receive an anonymous message, I also receive this:

To temporarily protect whichever staff member this one happened to be, I have blackened out your info. But I have it. I have your email address. Oh, and in case it’s a fake email address, I also have your computer IP address. Don’t know what that is? It’s a little number that will track your message right back to your computer. YOUR computer.

And you know what else I have? Techie friends. They’re pretty handy…you should get some of those.

I feel certain that the Board of Education for the State of Virginia would be thrilled to know what kind of staff members it has working at Grayson County High School. I’m sure they’d love to know that the staff is calling attention to one child’s past, and threatening to list the info (some true, some not) on a public, social forum.

And I can’t wait to tell them.

For those of you who have already commented – consider yourself informed. For those who want to comment in the future in the same manner – heed my warning.

I’m sick of it.

But thank you for reminding me why this needs to be done. The corruption in this school is sickening.

***

“The fight for justice against corruption is never easy. It never has been and never will be. It exacts a toll on our self, our families, our friends, and especially our children. In the end, I believe, as in my case, the price we pay is well worth holding on to our dignity.”
– Frank Serpico

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: basketball, blog, change, coach, corruption, faculty, family, GCHS, high school, mother, Quotes, school board, son, staff, students. 7 Comments

Oct. ’14

Lead By Example

“It’s hard being a girl. There are a lot of body image issues that come up and I think the best thing we can do for our kids is lead by example.”
– Cheryl Hines

Some of you may remember me mentioning a while back that I am now helping coach a new Girls on the Run team in our area. If you’re not familiar with Girls on the Run, we are basically what the name implies…girls on the run! We have a team of 3rd – 5th grade girls and we meet twice a week…not only to run, but also to talk about the qualities and values we need to have to be the best ladies we can be out here in this big ole world. And believe me, I’m learning just as much as the girls are. No doubt about it.

Which brings me to the topic of today’s blog.

One of the things the other two coaches and I have discussed is the importance of participating in both the physical activities (running, warmups, etc.) and the mental activities (lessons about our character, etc.) right along with the girls. It’s one thing to tell people what they should do, but it becomes a whole different lesson when you show them. It means more. For instance, if we expect the girls to do 20 laps, then we get out there and do 20 laps with them. If we are teaching a lesson about the importance of not gossiping, we have to make sure we don’t find ourselves in situations where we, as adults, are doing just that. You catch my drift?

We have to not only lead these girls, but lead them by example.

Now, I thought I was doing a pretty job of this whole concept. I mean, after all, I’m currently training for a marathon…surely I’m leading by example as far as running is concerned, right? And when we have our lessons about character traits, I’ve been willing to share personal info from my own life (including the parts I admittedly need to work on myself…I mean, who knew that listening was actually a part of the process when I’m arguing with my fiancé, Richard? Hey…you learn something new every day, right?) But earlier this week, something caught me slightly off guard. My “lead by example” strategy got challenged.

One of our girls was talking to me during our laps, and she mentioned how much trouble she has with her “crazy hair.” Now, this wasn’t the first time this girl has mentioned her hair, so I know it is somewhat of a sore spot with her. Like me, she has been “blessed” with a head full of curly hair. And, as we all know, the straight-haired girls want the curls and the curly-haired girls want to give them to them. I understood this girl’s dilemma quite well. Taming the mane does not come easy.

So, we had a conversation that went a little something like this:

Her: I have so much trouble with my crazy hair!
Me: Why do you call it crazy hair? You have great hair!
Her: You don’t understand. It’s curly and frizzy and everywhere all the time.
Me: Oh, I definitely understand, silly. Mine is exactly the same.
Her: *quizzical look* No, it’s not.
Me: Well, sure it is.
Her: I can’t tell. You always wear it back.
Me: Well…

And here’s where I had to actually stop myself from saying what was on the tip of my tongue. Because you know what almost came out? What almost spilled out of my face was, “Well, that’s because my hair is horrible and I can’t do anything with it.”

Whooops.

Didn’t I just finish telling her that we had the same hair? If I said that, what would I be telling her about her own hair?

I can’t remember exactly how I finished the conversation. I think I told her something about how as you get older, you find more ways to fix your hair and different products that make you learn to like it better, etc. Which is true. But you know what I usually do with my crazy curls? Straighten them. And when I don’t have time for that, I pile them in a ponytail or in a bun. I hide them.

Here’s where I need to learn to lead by example.

If I tell this little girl to embrace her curls and learn to love them…all while mine are hidden from view, is she going to hear me? Is she going to learn to accept herself for who she is and not try to “fix” what she perceives as an error to make herself more “acceptable” to her peers? *sigh* I’m guessing not.

Time to lead by example.

So, today, my crazy curls are flapping around for all the world to see. When I get to practice in a few hours, that little girl is going to see that she and her coach have a little something in common…curly, “crazy” hair that we are learning to accept and appreciate. Together, we are going to show each other that this thing that makes us unique, somehow also makes us the same. And we are going to learn to be proud of that fact…not try to hide it.

So, thank you my little Girls on the Run student for showing this old gal a little thing or two.

Are you leading by example in your life? Something to think about, isn’t it? The little people are watching…don’t forget that.

***

“An ounce of practice is worth more than tons of preaching.”
– Mahatma Gandhi

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: blog, blogging, change, changed, character, character traits, children, coach, curly, example, exercise, flaws, friendship, girls, girls on the run, hair, influence, inspiration, inspire, kids, lead by example, leader, leaders, marathon, motivate, motivation, photos, problems, Quotes, run, runner, running, sharing, students, training, traits, writing. Leave a comment

Sep. ’14

Girls on the Run

“Running has given me the courage to start, the determination to keep trying, and the childlike spirit to have fun along the way.”
– Julie Isphording, Marathon winner

So, how many of you have heard of Girls on the Run?

Now, wait a minute. All you non-runners…get back here. Not so fast. I know how you are. “Oh great, another blog about running. I’m not a runner. I’m out.” Well, hold it there, missy. (Or mister.) Stick around for a second. I want to tell you about something pretty awesome. (Especially those of you with daughters…you’re going to want to hear this.)

I spent my day today getting to know about Girls on the Run. Now, I had heard of it before, of course, as I’m sure many of you have. And, like many of you, I assumed that this was some kind of school “running team.” I mean, it’s called Girls on the Run. It must be girls running, right?

Well, yeah. That’s partly true. But, wow. There is soooo much more to it than that.

Girls on the Run – Westwood site coaches

I have recently been given the awesome opportunity to be an assistant coach for a Girls on the Run team in my area – Ashe County, North Carolina. See this pretty lady here to the right? That’s Natalie Foreman. Although the two of us didn’t know each other that well, our shared love of writing caused our paths to cross a short while back. She’s a local editor who happened to be the one reviewing an essay I’ve written for an upcoming anthology. And that essay just happened to be about…you guessed it…running. And just before Natalie had read that essay, she had been toying with the idea of getting a Girls on the Run program started in our area. She had done all the research, checked into all the details of securing a location, etc. But what was she missing? An assistant coach. And Fate, as she so often does, just happened to drop a runner’s essay on her desk.

So, Natalie gave me a call.

And here we were today, two practical strangers, headed to a coaches’ meeting.

Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect. I had done a little research on my own, of course, but I still didn’t realize what all was involved with the program. Again, I had it in my head that we were going to go to this coaches’ meeting and they were going to teach about us about different exercises, different methods to teach the girls to increase their running distances week-by-week, etc. But nope. That’s not what happened at all.

I walked away from that coaches’ meeting feeling like I knew everyone in the room. Especially Natalie. And I walked away feeling like I could actually succeed at coaching for this Girls on the Run program.

How did that happen? Well, it’s like this.

The program director taught us how to teach the kids. She put us in a setting that the girls would be in. She showed us the different games, conversations, techniques, etc., that the students would be going through in our program. For today, we were the students.

We got to know each other. We got to know our likes, our dislikes. We got to know our vast array of personalities and how each of us could still get along and come together for a common goal…not only despite our differences, but because of them. We came away from that meeting knowing that a group of drastically different strangers, could walk away a few hours later as friends. We walked away feeling confident in ourselves, feeling special because of the little idiosyncrasies that made each of us different from one another, and feeling beautifully unique. And most importantly, we walked away excited for the next time that we could all be together.

And that, my friends, is what Girls on the Run is all about.

Do you know a 3rd-5th grade girl that lives in or around the Ashe County area? Well, I know two women who started the day as strangers and ended it as friends, who absolutely can’t wait to show that little girl how that happens. Life is so hard for girls these days. Maybe it always has been, but I just feel like it’s just a tad harder now. There’s so much media and peer pressure to be a certain way, or act a certain way, or…worst of all…to look a certain way. What these girls need is an outlet. A place to come to feel safe. To feel like they can be themselves…where differences are celebrated, not shunned. And where they will get to have a fun, playful workout in the process.

Here’s a quick rundown of the details for you local peeps:

Meetings will be Tuesdays and Thursdays from 3:30 – 4:45 p.m. at Westwood Elementary School. (Students do not have to attend Westwood Elementary to participate – that is just the meeting location.)
Meetings technically start this Tuesday, September 9, but if you haven’t signed up by then, it’s not too late! (We have about two weeks to get all the registrations in.)
This is a 12-week program, that will culminate in a 5K race for the girls in all area Girls on the Run programs on December 6, 2014.
Coaches are head coach, Natalie Foreman (who is a runner and has a third grade girl herself), and myself (who wishes her daughter was still young enough to participate, but who is also a runner and absolutely adores working with kids!). We will also have a part-time assistant coach, Thea Van Sickle Young, who will be available to help out on Tuesdays.
Sign-up and other info can be found by clicking here. (There is a cost to the program, but reduced fees are available to kids who receive free/reduced price school lunches.)
Girls on the Run of the High Country Facebook link can be found here.

And there you have it, folks.

If you have read this blog and are local, please do Natalie and me a favor. Will you share this? We just know that there is a girl out there who needs this program. (We know there are many girls who need it actually.) And the only way they’ll know about it is if they hear about it. Help us spread the word. Without a certain number of girls signed up, we will not be able to proceed with the program. We really don’t want to see that happen. Our hearts are in this, and we know how much the girls need it.

Help us make a difference, won’t you?

Thank you for taking the time to read this. Click on the flyer below for a little more info and…share, share, share! And, of course, let me know if you have any questions or need more info!

Let’s start a new generation of healthy, happy, confident girls, shall we?

***

“The woman who starts the race is not the same woman who finishes the race.”
-Sign at the Nike Women’s Marathon