Tag Archives: writing

Laughter

“The most wasted of all days is one without laughter.”
– e. e. cummings

A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog about our dog, Lucy, and a lesson I learned from her one day. Well, apparently, Lucy hasn’t hung up her teaching hat just yet – she had yet another tutorial for me this week.

If I didn’t describe Lucy well enough in my last blog, let me give you a few more details. Lucy is one seriously happy dog. I mean…seriously. That girl LOVES everything. She loves me, she loves my boyfriend Richard, she loves our kids, she loves squirrels, birds, the mailman, the UPS guy, the cats….(ok, that may be pushing it a little – she loves torturing them, does that count?)

But I noticed something else about her the other day that made me smile. Apparently, Lucy’s happiness isn’t just dependent upon someone or something else being around. I was walking through the house and just happened to glance out the window and there stood Lucy in the middle of the yard – not looking at anything in particular, not doing anything noteworthy, just standing there – and that tail of hers was just wagging to beat the band. No one else around, and Lucy was just as happy as she could be. Just because.

I told Richard about it later and said, “I want to be just like Lucy. I want to be so happy that I wag my tail even when nobody’s looking, don’t you?”

He laughed and agreed, the subject was dropped, and we went on about our business. Situation forgotten.

Until a few days later. I was driving along in my car listening to the audio books that I always listen to when I’m traveling anywhere, and I realized that I wasn’t retaining much of what I was hearing. I was just stressed and distracted and not in the mood to try to follow along with a book. So, I ejected the audio book CD and started looking for something else to pop in, when I came across a CD that my ex-husband bought me the other day. Yes, you read that right – my ex-husband bought me a CD. Ok, it was a $1 CD that he saw at Goodwill, but still. It was nice of him to think of me. What was the CD, you ask? New Kids on the Block’s greatest hits. Yup. He remembered that I used to be an NKOTB freak (their last known fan actually – I have a tendency to hold on a little too long), and he thought I’d like it. Up to this point, I hadn’t listened to it yet, but I just decided to go ahead and throw it in the player and see what they sounded like after all these years. And boy, was I glad I did. I was immediately transformed back to the late 80s/early 90s and I still remembered just about every word to every song. Before long, I was signing at the top of my lungs like nobody’s business – and with a goofy smile on my face to boot.

That’s when I noticed the car that had pulled up beside me at the red light.

And what did I do? *sigh* I turned the music down, wiped the smile off my face, and sat staring straight ahead until the light changed.

Now, what the heck did I do that for?

Isn’t that dumb? What’s wrong with wagging my tail when I thought no one was looking, you know? I was just so darn afraid of how I looked to someone else. Why are people like that? It’s just plain silly. I don’t even think I gave it much thought at the time – I think it was just instinct to pull it together and look like a decent, non-crazy, non-NKOTB fan girl and make myself ‘presentable’ once I knew I had an audience.

I so need to stop that.

I’m like that with pictures too. I am the queen of “Wait – don’t take the picture yet, I’m not ready.” Or, “Ew, that one looks like crap, let’s take another one.” My family just loooooves that too, let me tell ya. And my boyfriend Richard and I couldn’t be more different when it comes to that kind of thing. He is crazy about the candid photos – the ones that no one knew were coming or that we weren’t exactly ‘ready’ for. Me? I think I look like a doofus. Especially the pictures where I’m laughing.

See this picture? For some dumb reason, I never posted this picture on Facebook or had it framed. I wasn’t “ready” when the picture was taken. Instead, I posted the version where we were standing up straight, both looking at the camera, smiling, with just one arm around each other. I even have it framed and sitting on my bookshelf at home. But this one? This one was just sitting on my phone as one of the ‘mess ups.’ I ask myself now, “What the heck were you thinking, woman!?” I mean, look at that picture. My daughter is all snuggled up to me and I’m laughing. I think I had told her to stand closer just before the picture was snapped, so she bear hugged me being silly.

Good grief, Me. Get it together. *These* are the memories you want to hold on to.

Or, how about this one? We were trying to take a ‘selfie’ just before we had gotten all dressed up to go to the theatre together. It took about 30 shots before we finally got the ‘right’ one – you know, the one where we’re both smiling sweetly and looking straight the camera. This funny, goofy one where I was laughing so hard my eyes disappeared was never posted. This shows so much more of our personalities than the one that I did deem ‘post-able.’ Kelly being silly, me laughing like a dork – this is ‘us.’

But I was just so afraid of it not looking ‘right.’ Not looking good enough. Not being posed and ‘perfect.’

Silly, silly me.

So, today, I ask you this – are you like me? Do you make sure the picture looks ‘just right’ before you take it? Do you hold back on laughing so that you don’t like an open-mouthed hyena? Do you stifle your happiness so that you look decent and presentable to strangers that don’t even matter? Do you only publicly post the pictures where you’re smiling perfectly and everything is in order?

Or are you like Lucy? Do you express your joy, no matter the circumstances…laugh until you cry when you see the ones you love…stay so happy that you wag your tail even when you’re alone? And for Heaven’s sakes, not stop just because someone is looking?

Well, here’s my advice. Be like Lucy.

We only get one go-around, you know? Just one. Don’t waste it. Wag your tail, people. Just wag it.

Life sure is a heck of a lot better that way.

Thanks for yet another lesson learned, Lucy dear.

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: appearance, blog, blogging, daughter, family, happiness, inspiration, inspirational, memories, mother, motivational, photos, pictures, Quotes, sharing, writer, writing. 2 Comments

Mar. ’14

#tbt Poetry – Aspiration

For all two of you who are reading these throwback Thursday poems, here’s the one for this week. Circa 2002 or so.

***

Aspiration

You keep me going.
You make sure I take just one more step
Go that one extra mile
Take that final leap.
(You are responsible for all that!)
You fill my heart with music –
My mind with phrases –
My pen with energy.
What would I be without you?
Who would I be without you?

Ode to the dreams that have not yet faded…

***

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Poetic Musings. Tags: #tbt, aspiration, blog, blogging, dreams, heart, inspiration, inspirational, love, motivation, motivational, passion, poem, poet, poetry, writer, writing. Leave a comment

Mar. ’14

I Need A Muffin

“When we get too caught up in the busyness of the world, we lose connection with one another – and ourselves.”
– Jack Kornfield

Well, if you’ve noticed, I haven’t been posting on here as much as I used to. Things have been a bit busy.

As most of you know from previous posts, in addition to being a writer, I am also an actor with community theatre. For the past month, I’ve actually been working on two shows at the same time. One just wrapped up last week, and I’m currently in the last weeks of rehearsal for the next one. In other words, it’s crunch time.

Again.

I seem to live my life in this way, I’ve noticed. It always seems like I’m on the go. Training for a race, rehearsing for a show, writing a novel (that’s the new one on the list). Always busy. Always working my butt off while inching towards something. Never seeming to slow down.

Now, I’m not saying this is a bad thing. As Maya Angelou is quoted as saying:

“It has been said that we need just three things in life: Something to do, Something to look forward to, and Someone to love.”

I’m so blessed to have every single one of those things at any given moment. Honestly, I’m just an overall happy person, with very few problems. I forget that fact from time to time, of course (like I think we all are guilty of), but it’s always true.

However, the other day, something humorous – and important – caught my attention. I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, so I thought I’d share it here with you. Maybe it might mean something to you, too. You never know.

My boyfriend Richard and our kids go to church on Sundays as often as we can. And since the kids adore the Sunday school portion of church, Richard and I have found our way to an adult class that we have come to love as much as they do. Our wonderful instructor, Teresa, does a sweet thing each and every Sunday morning – she bakes muffins and brings them in to share with us. Well, word has gotten around (or maybe that wonderful smell has gotten around!) that there are muffins on the premises, and some of the kids have started wandering into our class to get themselves one or two. And this past Sunday, one of these kids who was doing just that very thing, made quite an impression on me.

There we sat in class, engrossed in the powerful words that Teresa always has to share with us, when we heard the church bells ring signaling the end of class. Since we weren’t quite done with our discussion, we sat for a few extra minutes sharing some final words before packing up to head out. Once the discussion was complete, we all started fumbling for our things as Teresa walked over to open the classroom door. She opened the door, and there stood the cutest little girl you’ve ever seen. She just stood there, waiting quietly and patiently for the door to be open, and once it was, she made her presence known with this statement:

“I need a muffin.”

That’s all she said. Just four little words to state her purpose. And in she walked, got her muffin, and went about her business.

Well, of course, we all laughed and laughed over that. The hilarity behind this little girl just standing there waiting patiently for the door to open so she could state her purpose and get what she needed led to some serious giggles from the adults. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that there is actually a lot I could learn from that little girl.

1. Don’t be in a hurry. She knew the muffin would be there when the door was open, so she was patient. She didn’t bust in the room and interrupt class, no matter how much that little tummy was growling. She just waited her turn. She knew when muffin time would be and didn’t try to make it happen a second sooner.

2. Decide what you need, and go get it. There was no question what Little Miss wanted. A muffin. And she didn’t just want it. She needed it. So, by gosh, she made it happen.

3. Indulge every now and then. Ok, so muffins aren’t the healthiest things in the world? So what! When you need a muffin, you need a muffin. That’s just all there is to it. There is a time for meat and potatoes; there is a time for fruit and vegetables; and then….then there is a time for muffins. Recognize that time and savor it. Everything doesn’t have to be done ‘right’ all the time. Sometimes, it’s ok to take a muffin break. It just is.

So, there ya have it. Some “food for thought” for us all from a little girl who needed a muffin.

*giggle*

Maybe I’m seeing too much in this? I don’t know. Maybe. It wouldn’t be the first time that’s ever happened.

But then again – maybe that little girl just taught us all a few lessons that we needed to hear. Maybe sometimes I need to sit back and take a quick break before proceeding on with the pursuit of all these goals. Maybe sometimes I need to stop working on my novel, and throw in a short blog again now and then. Maybe sometimes I need to stop studying my lines, and watch a TV show with my kids. Maybe sometimes I need to stop training for a race, and just leave my GPS tracking device at home and run a few miles for fun.

You see where I’m going with that? Eh, I don’t know. Are you with me? Could you use a muffin break yourself?

With that said, please excuse me. I better wrap this blog up for the moment. There’s something very important and yummy calling my name….

***

“The really idle man gets nowhere. The perpetually busy man does not get much further.”
– Sir Heneage Ogilvie

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: blog, break, change, food for thought, health, inspiration, inspirational, motivation, motivational, muffins, Quotes, relax, slow down, take a break, take it easy, writer, writing. 1 Comment

Feb. ’14

#tbt Poetry – Silence

In keeping with my “Throwback Thursday” poetry idea from last week, here’s one from 2011. (Didn’t throwback too far with this one. Truthfully, I seem to have misplaced my old poetry folder in my recent move, so I’m still searching. I’ll get to the really old ones as I soon as I find that darn thing….)

***

Silence

Nothingness.
Quiet.
Confusion.
Silence.

Memories begin to drift back to the noise…
Back to the happiness,
the lights, the sounds,
the laughter
Spinning around at top speed on a merry-go-round
Filled with smiles and giggling children and chirping birds
“Tickets, get your tickets!”
Come ride the ride!

Then suddenly…

Silence.

Where did it go?
Was it even real?

I want my money back.

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Poetic Musings. Tags: #tbt, blog, heartbreak, lonely, loss, love, poem, poet, poetry, relationships, sadness, silence, Throwback Thursday, writer, writing. 1 Comment

Feb. ’14

What A Novel Idea

“I like the challenge of trying different things and wondering whether it’s going to work or whether I’m going to fall flat on my face.”
– Johnny Depp

So, have I mentioned that I’m writing a novel?

Finally. After all of these years of writing poetry and essays, I finally decided to bite the bullet and give a novel a try. I never thought I could do this. First of all, I have never been the greatest at that whole “follow through” thing. Oh you know how it is – you get these great big grandiose ideas in your mind, and maybe you even actually start on them, but to follow through? Ok, I’m out. That follow through thing takes too much work. On to the next great idea…

You feel me? Been there yourself? Oh yeah – when it comes to follow through, jumping ship has always been my superpower.

And another reason I’ve been hesitant to write a novel? Well, I’m not exactly a ‘fiction’ writer. Most everything I’ve written over the years has just been observations of the world around me, not something that I made up in my mind. Yes, yes, I know all books don’t have to be fiction. There are plenty of great non-fiction books out there in the world. But something I came across once in some “how to be a writer” article or another was this piece of advice that I’ve never forgotten. It said that there is something important that you need to remember when you are ready to take on the challenge of writing a novel.

“Write something that you would like to read.”

Although at first glance that seems pretty obvious, there’s actually much more wisdom to that than you might think. While I have always written poetry and essays, when I go to a bookstore, are the poetry and essay books the first ones I head to? Nope. I like novels. Fiction. I love them. I eat them up. I love the ones about family connections, the ones about mysteries, the ones with a strong, likeable heroine as the main character….all that stuff.

So, why am I not writing that?

Well, other than the reasons I’ve mentioned before, there’s also the big reason. The reason that we all have whenever we’re afraid to rise to any challenge in our lives. What’s that reason, you ask? Well, I think you know.

I’m afraid I’ll fail.

What if I spend all this time writing a fiction novel…and it blows? You know? I mean, it’s highly likely for that to be the case. I’m not a novelist. I’m a beginner. It may never get read by anyone except my boyfriend Richard. (You know he’ll be forced to read it. I’m sure he already thinks I’m a little crazy for talking about these characters as if they were real people as it is…) It may never get published and may just remain a pile of words sitting on a computer hard drive somewhere for the rest of my life.

Or.

Or…maybe someone will like it. Maybe it will get published. And read. And (as is the most important thing to me…), identified with. Wouldn’t that be awesome?

Eh. Either way. It’s time to try, right?

I compare it to when I first started running. I remember the absolute glee I felt the first time I ran one mile without stopping. (Quotes?) And then the first time I ran an actual 5K. (Poetry?) And then the pride and accomplishment I felt when I ran my first half marathon. (Essays?). Well, now it’s time to rise to the challenge and take it a step further. Just as I never thought I’d be able to get this far with my running, I also thought I’d never get this far with my writing. I have an essay published in Chicken Soup for the Soul, for Heaven’s sakes! That’s a big deal. And I’ve ran not one, but two half marathons. The lesson to be learned is that I can do things that I never thought possible.

Maybe it’s time to step up my game?

So here’s to the future. Here’s to a finished novel (good or bad) and to a full marathon one of these days. It doesn’t have to be the best – it just has to get done. It just has to.

Bucket list, make room. A few more things are about to join the ranks…

***

“I want to challenge you today to get out of your comfort zone. You have so much incredible potential on the inside. God has put gifts and talents in you that you probably don’t know anything about.”
– Joel Osteen

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: author, blog, blogging, book, change, chicken soup for the soul, essays, family, fiction, heart, inspiration, inspirational, love, motivation, motivational, non-fiction, novel, novelist, passion, poetry, Quotes, writer, writing. 5 Comments

Feb. ’14

#tbt Poetry – Forgotten Mistress

“A poet is, before anything else, a person who is passionately in love with language.”
– W. H. Auden

I see everyone posting these “Throwback Thursday” photos on Facebook, so I have decided to do my own little blog version of it. Every Thursday, I plan to post an old poem that I wrote, together with the approximate year it was written. I used to write a lot of poetry back in the day (not great poetry, mind you) before I started writing the essay/short story style writings that I now prefer. So, let’s dig out some of this old stuff and broadcast that old undeveloped talent, shall we? 😉

First up, is Forgotten Mistress. Written in 2003.

Forgotten Mistress

I am looking in the window-
Standing on tiptoe to see-
Watching the life go on inside
The life that doesn’t include me

I see the family that loves him
Who will always welcome him home
I see the good times that abound
As I stand here all alone.

I wonder, Does he see me
Out of the corner of his eye?
Am I included in his vision
As the walls keep me outside?

Am I the secret no one mentions-
The dirty reminder of a fall?
Or have I already been forgotten
Not even thought about at all?

I know that I should turn away
From this sight I cannot bear to see
From watching the life go on inside
The life that doesn’t include me.

But yet, I stand here waiting
For that invitation I will never receive
And I’ll remain outside this window
Until I can find the strength to leave.

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Poetic Musings. Tags: #tbt, blog, blogging, change, exclusion, forgotten, heartbreak, inspiration, inspirational, loss, love, loyalty, mistress, old writings, poem, poet, poetry, Quotes, relationships, Throwback Thursday, writer, writing. Leave a comment

Feb. ’14

Story about a Dog

“We fear things in proportion to our ignorance of them.”
– Christian Nestell Bovee

I want to tell you a story about a dog.

And it’s not just any dog, mind you. I’d like you to meet my boyfriend Richard’s sweet little german shepherd, Lucy. Isn’t she the cutest little booger? So incredibly sweet. So lovable. So happy. And so…*ahhem*…um, how shall I say this?…unintelligent? Heh. Bless her sweet little heart, she’s not exactly the brightest bulb in the box. But she sure makes up for it in sweetness though, that’s for sure. Well, I have a story about one of Lucy’s recent…let’s just say mental lapses…that I thought was pretty interesting.

Now Lucy is a little over a year old and, all her life, has been taught that she is NOT to come in the house. She’s an outside dog, and that’s always been perfectly fine with her. Well….now here we are faced with this awful winter we’ve been having, so we decided to try to bend the rules a little. With sub-zero temps and wind chills to boot, it was time to let Lucy in the house.

Heh. WRONG.

Lucy was having NONE of that. You don’t teach a dog not to come in the house and then invite them in. No way, not Miss Lucy. Her daddy said a long time ago that she wasn’t supposed to be in the house and that was that, by gosh. We cajoled, we pushed, we pulled, we begged…but she wasn’t budging.

So, on to Plan B.

Richard, being the sweetheart that he is, decided that he couldn’t bear knowing that all she was going to have as shelter would be a drafty garage. Yes, it would block the worst of the wind, but it still wasn’t all that toasty in there. So, he rigged up a little space heater for her right next to her dog bed. That way, she would at least feel the heat from it as long as she stayed in her bed for the night. Problem solved. We’re going on a few months of this space heater warmth for Lucy on these cold winter nights and all has been working just fine, thank you.

Until yesterday, that is.

*sigh*

Now, I mentioned that Lucy is a sweet little thing right? Sooooo sweet. Smart? Eh. Notsomuch.

I left early in the morning for work and Richard was close behind. We both had very long days yesterday, consisting of real estate work here and there and followed up by rehearsal (for me) and sound work (for him) at the theatre until late in the evening. And then, after topping the night off with a quick bite to eat and a glass of wine or two at our favorite restaurant, we finally made our way back home. And what did we find when we got there?

Lucy. In the garage.

Stuck.

And by “stuck,” let me explain. This space heater that I described to you is a long, low-to-the-ground type. It resembles a baseboard heater somewhat. Before Richard had left for the day, he went into the garage through the open door (on the opposite side of the heater) and Lucy had followed him in. As he was leaving, he shut the garage door behind him with Lucy still inside, knowing that it was ok to do so since Lucy could easily go out the side door that we always keep open for her. Well, what he didn’t realize, was that the heater (which was not on, by the way) had been pushed to the side just slightly and was now…um…”blocking” Lucy’s path to the side door.

Now, I mentioned this heater is low to the ground, right? And by low to the ground, I mean probably 6 inches. Tops. So this 6-inch tall non-functioning space heater stood between Lucy and the side door of freedom.

It took us a minute to realize what the problem was once we got home. I was the first to arrive and was shocked that Lucy didn’t come flying to me with her tail flapping as she always does. I heard her whining in the garage, but she wouldn’t come to me. I walked a little further in and saw that she was just standing there. That’s it. Just standing there looking at me. (And crying, the poor little thing.)

So, I called to her. “Come here, Lucy. Come here, girl.”

Still. Nothing.

That’s when I realized that she was refusing to step across the little heater. I walked over and simply pushed the heater a few inches to the side, and let me tell you – you would not believe the happiness that burst forth from that sweet little dog. She bolted out of that garage, went straight to the yard to ‘take care of some overdue business,’ and then came bounding back to me for her “Hello, I’m glad you’re home, I love you, I love you, I love you” kisses.

When Richard got home, we laughed about that silly dog being “stuck” in the garage, all because she refused to step across the heater. But then the more we talked about it, the more we realized that, although the heater wasn’t hot at the moment, Lucy must have learned (the hard way, I’m guessing) that that heater could be hot. So, she figured it was best to play it safe. Even if it meant imprisonment.

Now, you guys realize I’m a writer right? And one thing I’ve noticed about we writers…we simply cannot see a situation in only a literal sense. Oh no – there is always a deeper meaning to just about everything. This time was no exception.

I thought about poor sweet Lucy and wondered how many times I’ve done that myself. How many times have I chosen imprisonment and sacrificed my freedom, simply because I was afraid to attempt something that may have hurt me in the past? And how many times was that thing that I thought was going to hurt me, simply just there for my benefit and not going to hurt me at all? And how many times have I, due to being ignorant to the harmlessness of the obstacle (simply because I was not willing to test it out), therefore remained in the tiny, lonely, confined space of my own making?

And while we’re on the subject – how many times have you done that?

Pretty dumb, isn’t it?

So, yes, maybe this was just one instance of a not-so-smart doggy getting stuck in a garage behind a heater. Or…

Or.

Maybe this was one of those lessons that life puts in front of you all of the time…if you’ll just take a moment to stop and notice it.

I don’t know about you, but I sure do know that Lucy was pretty darn happy to be free. Maybe you should give freedom a try yourself.

***

“Ultimately we know deeply that the other side of every fear is freedom.”
– Marilyn Ferguson

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: blog, change, changed, confinement, dog, dog lessons, fear, heartbreak, imprisonment, inspiration, inspirational, lonliness, love, motivation, motivational, photos, Quotes, relationships, writer, writing. 3 Comments

Feb. ’14

To My Valentine

“At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.”

– Plato

To My Valentine….

Valentine’s Day’s
the time they say
to show what they mean to you;
Chocolate bars,
sappy cards,
dinners just for two

Candlelight talks,
moonlit walks,
Sweet music to serenade
One night to show
that special glow
From the love you both have made

It sounds so nice
most don’t think twice
They throw their all into this day
And while I do understand
most couple’s plans
For us, it’s not quite this way

The lives we lead
are busy indeed
And are filled with much to do
With four kids between
(and most are teens!)
Little remains for me and you

With their needs galore;
clothes, concerts and more
Birthday presents around every bend
The wallet stays bare;
(surprised we even have hair!)
And before we know it, the money’s all spent

So we find other means
(not requiring much green)
To show the love that lies within
Those arms that you place
around my waist
Those sweet dimples in your grin

The hours you spend
shoveling snow with no end
So my little car can get out of the drive
The errands you run
when I’m coming undone
From the stress of these busy lives

Your sweet, gentle ways
through these hectic days
That keeps me from coming unglued
Every kiss that you place
upon my grateful face
Shows how much I am loved by you

I hope mere words are enough
to thank you for your love
For all the many loving things that you do,
Valentine’s Day and the rest
I am loved by the best –
Thank God for the gift that is you.

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Poetic Musings. Tags: blog, inspirational, kids, love, motivation, motivational, parents, passion, poem, poetry, relationships, Valentines Day, writing. Leave a comment

Feb. ’14

Coke

“The essence of the beautiful is unity in variety.”
– Felix Mendelssohn

Ok. So, unless you’ve been living under a rock since the Super Bowl aired, I’m guessing you’ve probably heard about the backlash that Coke has received for its ‘controversial’ ad aired during the game. Didn’t see the commercial? Well, here ya go. Take a look:

I know I’m not going to say anything new with this blog. Anything I have to say about my opinion on this matter has probably been said by many others. And that’s fine. But I still think it’s important for my voice to be heard, even amid all the others. As Plato is quoted as saying: “Your silence gives consent.” Well, that’s not going to happen for this girl. I’m going to say what I have to say about the matter, and then move on.

What is the ‘controversy’ you ask? Well, obviously, we see a video filled with people of differing nationalities, ethnicities, etc. singing America the Beautiful. And some of our fellow Americans are saying that this is *ahhem* “un-American.”

So, first of all, I suppose I should say that I shouldn’t be surprised. Hardly anything can happen these days without some type of controversy surrounding it, especially when it involves differences among fellow human beings (*gasp!* Heaven forbid!). But even though I readily agree that I shouldn’t be surprised, I still have to admit that I am. Seriously, people? We’re still at this point?

For God’s sake, what is it going to take??

Let me ask you to do something. Look to your left. Now, look to your right. And I want you to tell me what you see. Do you see someone who looks exactly like you? Someone who wears their hair the same way, has the same family background that you do, the same job, the same amount of money in their bank account? Do you see someone who has the same number of children you do (or lack thereof), the same eye color, the exact same skin tone? Does that person share your religion? Is every single thing about them exactly the same as you?

Duh. I’m guessing probably not. And you know why that is? BECAUSE WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT. That’s just all there is to it. We are not a world made up of robots. The differences are wide and numerous and there’s no way I could sit here and list them all. But here’s the thing: just because something is different, that doesn’t make it wrong. Why is that so hard to understand for some people?

What gives anyone…anyone…the right to decide which differences are ok, and which ones aren’t? So, the person to your left came from a lower class neighborhood than you did, and that’s ok. But their first language isn’t English, and that’s not ok? Which background differences are ones you’ll accept and which ones aren’t? Aren’t you kind of playing God there, my friend?

And back to Coke. First of all, every single one of the people in their ad was an American. They said so. They didn’t go to other countries to film this. They didn’t bring people from other countries in to sing about our great nation. No, they chose Americans. Our friends and neighbors that make up our diverse land. And they tried to show you the beauty that exists in that. And why are we surprised that they did this? One of the most memorable ads from my childhood is the one that Coke did in the 70s using the song, “I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing.” Remember that one?

Here’s a portion of the lyrics:

I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.
I’d like to hold it in my arms, and keep it company
I’d like to see the world for once all standing hand in hand.
And hear them echo through the hills for peace throughout the land.

Man. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Coke has always stuck to the theme that America is beautiful. And it’s the diversity that makes it so. We are supposed to pride ourselves in our acceptance of every walk of life. Of not forcing one religion or one life path onto the millions of people who grace our land. [Take a look at some of the other third world countries for a second if you’ve forgotten how blessed you are to live here.] So, with the controversy that has sprung from this one commercial, what are we telling other countries? What message are we sending to them? And even more importantly, what message are we sending to ourselves? To our children?

Again, like I said, I’m not saying anything that I’m sure hasn’t already been said. I’m not changing the world and I’m most likely not changing any minds. Unfortunately, when I type the last word on this blog and click ‘publish,’ the world will continue on as it was before…there will still be hatred, bigotry, exclusion, and hypocrisy. I simply cannot change that.

But you know what else is going to happen after I click ‘publish’?

I am going to wrap up my work day, and then I’m headed to pick up the biggest variety of kids you’ve ever seen. Boys, girls, scholars, goofballs, white, black, geeks, jocks…you name it, I’m getting them. And I’m transporting them all to my house for my daughter’s 14th birthday party sleepover. We are going to eat pizza and cupcakes and watch movies and laugh until late into the night. We’re going to sing Happy Birthday at midnight to my baby as she turns 14 (in whatever language the kids want to sing it in). For this one night among all of the others, we are all going to come together for one purpose – to have fun celebrating a unique, talented, open-minded little teenager’s birthday. And then tomorrow, we’re all going to go back to our separate lives. Our separate family units, our separate religions, our separate homes.

No, I cannot change the world. I know that. But tomorrow as I say goodbye to this wide variety of my daughter’s friends as they return to their varied lives, I can bask in the glow of knowing that I have impacted and influenced one small part of the world. I have raised a beautiful daughter who knows no bounds in the love she feels for those around her. There are no exclusions when it comes to being her friend. The more different you are, so much the better. I have a raised a daughter that knows to look beyond outward differences, and dig a little deeper to see the heart that lies inside.

For this, I am proud. And for this, I will continue to voice my stance on the importance of unity amid diversity. Because I know, in the deepest part of my being, that at least one person is listening.

***

“Even if unity of faith is not possible, a unity of love is.”
– Hans Urs von Balthasar

Posted by Melissa Edmondson. Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings. Tags: America, blog, coke, coke ad, coke controversy, commercial, daughter, inequality, inspiration, inspirational, motivation, motivational, photos, Quotes, super bowl, unity, video, writing. 2 Comments

Feb. ’14

God’s Will?

Ok, so since my Jesus post from a few weeks ago didn’t get me stoned, I’m gonna try this one out and see what happens.

I have a friend on Facebook who recently posted about the fact that he has battled and defeated many addictions throughout the course of his life, ranging from alcohol to food. He made a blanket statement about how he was surprised at the fact that he had gotten through those trials, because he doesn’t feel like he has very much willpower. So, as is par for the course with Facebook, the comments started rolling in. And amid many of the well-intentioned comments, there seemed to exist the same theme.

“That’s because it wasn’t you, it was God’s work.”

“It was God’s will that you made it through.”

“God did it.”

*sigh*

Ok. Get your stones ready.

Every single time I see comments like this, I shudder a little. I’ve never really understood why that is. Like I’ve mentioned in the past, I’m not the most religious person on the planet. But I do believe there’s a God. I do. So, why does it bother me when I hear stuff like that? Shouldn’t it make me feel good? Strengthen my belief in the God that I believe in?

Well, this particular instance got me to thinking about this very thing. I dug a little deeper into why those statements bother me so much, and this blog is about what I came up with. Will you agree with me? I don’t know. It doesn’t matter, really. When it comes to religion, politics, and all that other good controversial stuff, it’s rare to find two people who truly see eye-to-eye on it all. And that’s ok. But I’m going to share my viewpoint with you anyway.

I started this blog with a picture/quote by J. G. Holland that says “God gives every bird its food, but he does not throw it into its nest.” (And I can’t even begin to tell you how long it took to find one with the correct usage of its/it’s. Phew! I finally gave up and made my own. Sheesh! But, hey, that’s a blog for another day. Back to the story….) To be quite honest with you, I think that quote stands alone and says about all that I need to say. Thank you, Mr. Holland. But let me elaborate a little more anyway, because that’s what I do.

To me, what this quote is saying is that yes, the answers to our problems are out there. They’re available to us. God’s not gonna leave us hanging. Like He says in Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you…” I firmly believe that the God I believe in is not one who is going to toss some bad things our way and watch us suffer with no way out. In fact, I don’t believe He is the one who throws bad things our way at all. Life does that. But regardless, there is going to be a way out of them.

But, see, here’s the thing. It’s not going to happen until we get off our butts and do something to make it happen. It’s not going to magically appear.

So, when people make such comments as “It was God’s will,” or “God did it,” I just can’t bring myself to believe that. God may be the one who provided the answer (i.e. the “food for the birds”), but I don’t believe He is the one who made it happen (i.e. “dropped it in its mouth”). In the case of my Facebook friend here, God did not stick down his big hand and physically turn my friend away from those addictions. My friend did that. He made the choice to turn away from those addictions and do the legwork that it took to break those bad habits. And does he deserve the credit? You bet he does.

I compare this to when my own child got the chance to play the lead role in our local production of Annie. Was I proud of her? Holy crap, you bet I was. But did I take the credit for her performance? Of course not. I may have helped her along the way. I may have advised her, encouraged her, and supported her. But did I do it for her? Of course, I didn’t. And if someone claimed as much, I’d probably be offended that they were focused on me and not giving her the credit she deserved.

I don’t think God feels much differently about His children as I do about mine. Do you?

Why are we so scared of being proud of ourselves? Or of allowing someone else to feel the pride that they deserve to feel?

I know we’ve all heard the saying “Pride goeth before a fall.” Maybe that’s where this unfounded fear comes from. But what you probably didn’t know is that this term is actually a shortened version of the verse found in Proverbs 16:18 that says: “Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.” When you look at that term in its entirety, as it is fully stated in the proverb, the “pride” it’s referring to is not the pride that comes from feeling as if you’ve done something good. Merriam-Webster’s dictionary defines “pride” in two ways:

Pride: a feeling that you are more important and better than other people; and
Pride: a feeling of happiness that you get when you or someone you know does something good, difficult, etc.

That first definition is what that verse is referring to. Not the second. Pride is a feeling of happiness. Don’t you think God wants us to be happy? There is nothing wrong with feeling proud of yourself. Nothing. And, on that same token, there’s nothing wrong with encouraging people to feel that pride in themselves. They worked hard; they deserve it. And the crazy thing is that the more pride you feel in yourself, the more likely you’ll be to keep going. Whether it’s fighting an addiction, working to better yourself physically, or maybe even…oh, I don’t know…writing? When someone recognizes your abilities and your talents, it really is ok to accept that recognition and bask in the glow of a job well done. Besides, you never know who you might be inspiring in the process.

So, hey. Maybe that might be something for you to think about the next time you innocently tell someone that it was God’s will when something good happens. Don’t negate what they have done by telling them that they didn’t do it. And don’t make the others out there who haven’t had such good fortune wonder why God isn’t on their side too. It’s just silly. Recognize them for the good that they have done, and congratulate them for it. They worked hard for it, whether they realize it or not, and they deserve to feel pride in themselves for what they’ve accomplished. And if you’re one of those people who deflect the compliments in that same manner? Maybe you should work on not doing that anymore. Yes, maybe God provided support and encouragement along the way, much like I did for my daughter as she found her way to playing the role of Annie, but I certainly didn’t pick her up and place her on that stage. Recognize your own efforts and applaud them.

And you know what? I’d be willing to bet that God is pretty darn proud of you, too.

***

“Calm self-confidence is as far from conceit as the desire to earn a decent living is remote from greed.”
– Channing Pollock