Tag Archives: passion

17

Mar. ’13

Favorite Race (so far)

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This is a picture I took at the Shamrock 4-miler, a St. Patrick’s Day theme race my son and I ran in Abingdon, Virginia, last night, March 15, 2013.

Now, granted, after every race I do, I seem to think that it was my favorite race.  And this was no exception.  But I have a feeling that this one may remain my favorite for a while.  And I’ve decided to list the top 10 reasons why.

*** 10.  The St. Patrick’s Day theme.
This was the first race I’d ever been a part of that had a theme.  And themes are awesome.  The atmosphere was completely different…everyone was in such happy spirits and seemed to be just a tad friendlier and a little more chatty than in other races.  I’ll definitely be searching for theme races in the future.

*** 9. The cowbell.
Oh yes.  There was a cowbell.  About a half a mile in, there was a random guy standing on the side of the road with a cowbell.  And, of course, the guy who was running beside me yelled, “Hey – we’re gonna need more cowbell!” as we passed.  Teehee.  That made me laugh all the way up the hill we had to climb right after we passed the cowbell man.  I needed that.

*** 8. A pooping dog.
Yes, you read that right.  A pooping dog made the top 10 list.  And here’s why.  One of the runners decided to run in the race with her dog.  Around the 1.5 mile mark, nature called.  She was standing, embarrassed, on the side of the road letting him do his business while other runners passed.  Eventually, runners started high-fiving her as they passed.  That was pretty awesome.  Lots of laughter came from that.  And laughter during a race is always awesome.  So, thank you pooping dog for your contribution to my list.

*** 7. This guy:
racebloggreenguy
Yeah.  Meeting that guy definitely made the list.  Duh.

*** 6. Being passed (yes, passed) by a man running the race while pushing his TWO kids in a stroller.
While going up a hill.  Yes, I know.  How did that make the list of reasons why this was my favorite race?  Well, just because.  People are awesome.  That’s all.

*** 5. Remembering to thank the people at the water stations.
I always forget to do that.  Always.  This time, I remembered.  There were three separate water stations and I remembered at every single station.  I finally forgot my own misery during a race and just remembered that there are awesome volunteers sitting out there for long periods of time just making sure that we have the best race we can.  And how cool are they?  They deserve more than a simple “thank you,” but that was all I had to give at the moment.  I hope hearing me say it made them feel as good as it made me feel to remember to say it.

*** 4. My time.
My MapMyRun tracking device told me that I ran 4.08 miles in just over 40 minutes.  That’s less than a 10-minute pace.  Best I’ve ever done.  Heck yeah, baby!  For this fairly new runner, that was something to be proud of.

*** 3. My kids’ dad.
Whoa.  I know, right?  How the heck did my ex-husband make this list?  I think you’ll soon understand.  Kevin (that’s his name) has Becker muscular dystrophy.  He is lucky to still be walking because the prognosis long ago was that he would have been in a wheelchair before he was 30.  (He’s 38.)  As I was leaving for the race after picking up my son, Kevin said something that stuck with me.  He said, “You guys do good.  I’d run it with you if I could.”  All I could think of after he said that, was this quote I saw once:

“I run because I can.  When I get tired, I remember those who can’t run, what they’d give to have this simple gift I take for granted, and I run harder for them.  I know they would do the same for me.”

That quote went through my mind many times during this race.  And now I have a feeling it will go through my mind in many more races to come.

*** 2. Memories
I had run a 5k race on this course once before.  It was last year.  I was afraid that running it again would actually make me feel sad because the person I ran it with wasn’t with me this time.  But you know what?  It didn’t make me sad at all.

The course was filled with memories at every turn.  At one point, I remembered how we both felt when we saw this dreaded hill looming ahead and realized just as we got to it that the course veered to the left and we didn’t have to actually run up it.  When I saw the hill this time, I just smiled.  Yep, no sadness.  Just a smile.

I remembered how we stayed at each other’s pace and he refused to leave me during the brief time that I had to stop to walk, when I know he could have gone on ahead easily. When I got to the place that I had to stop and walk that time and the memory filled my mind – again, I smiled.  (And went faster.)

There were many more memories throughout the race.  And many more smiles that accompanied them.  And that made me realize something.  I think something has healed.  And that’s a beautiful thing.

*** 1.  And hands down, the #1 reason why this was my favorite race?  This kid:
raceblog3jeff

That’s my son.  Now, this isn’t the first time we’ve ran a race together.  But this is the first time that he finished the race well ahead of me (as usual) and instead of waiting at the finish line, he turned around and came back on the course to find me.  I finished the race with my son by my side cheering me on.

So there.  The list is complete.

So, see?  How could this not have been my favorite race?

Oh, wait.  One more notable mention.

Another reason this was my favorite race?  I wrote this whole blog in my head while I was running it.  Combining two of my passions is a beautiful thing.

So blessed to be a runner.

***

“Methinks that the moment my legs began to move, my thoughts began to flow.”
– Henry David Thoreau

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15

Mar. ’13

Milestone

“I ran and ran and ran every day, and I acquired this sense of determination, this sense of spirit that I would never, never give up, no matter what else happened.”
– Wilma Rudolph

This week I hit a new milestone in my running.  I ran 6 miles without stopping.

milestoneblog2

So I titled this blog “Milestone.”  Heh.  Get it?  Milestone.  Oh, witty witty me.

Anyway…

So, yeah.  As you can see from the stats above, I’m not the fastest runner.  Not at all.  And, it was a treadmill run rather than an outside run (which people say is “easier,” but I beg to differ…).  And I know I still have a long way to go before I’m fully ready for this May 4 half marathon I’m signed up for.  I know there are more advanced runners looking at my accomplishment with a knowing smile remembering what it was like way back when they hit a little milestone like this.

But enough of that.  Enough trying to downplay what I just did.

Because, let me tell ya something.

While yes, there may be more advanced runners watching me way back here on my journey (while nevertheless cheering me on like I’ve won the lottery – because that’s how we runners roll), there’s also someone else watching me.

The March 2012 version of Melissa.

Oh yeah.  That girl was standing outside that gym with her hands cupped around her face looking through the window at me on that treadmill running 6 miles….and her jaw still hasn’t come up off the ground.  She’s astounded.  She would have never dreamed that this could be possible.  She couldn’t even run from the car to the front door of her house when it was raining outside to keep from getting soaked.  So, how on Earth could she be staring in this gym looking at this girl who just ran six miles?  SIX MILES?  And yes, it took her an hour and four minutes to do it.  But holy cow – she just ran for over an hour without stopping.  Ran!  For over an hour!  Hello?

Oh, that chick is proud.  Astounded, yes; flabbergasted, definitely; but oh so very proud.

And do you know who else is watching?

The Melissa of March 2014.  She’s one of those advanced runners I mentioned before.  She’s watching me with that all-knowing little grin on her face, wishing that I know now what she’s going to know then.  She wishes I could see that I am working towards such amazing and awesome things that my little mind can’t even comprehend them.  She wishes that I could know that everything is going to be great – my runs, my life, my heart – all of it.  She knows all of that, and just patiently smiles at me as she waits for me to catch up.

She knows that I’ve got this in the bag.  That no matter how long it takes, I’m going to do whatever I need to do to succeed.  She knows that I’m not going to let her down.  I’ve made promises to her that she knows I fully intend to keep.

She knows that I’m going to make it.

In honor of the ‘theme’ of this blog entry, I want to share something that I saw on the “Run Junkees” Facebook page:

Met a fellow runner named Chet over the weekend. He was an old school marathoner, completing his first in 1987. While running a marathon Chet happened along side a fellow runner who was best described as short and stout. Chet engaged the runner in a brief conversation and said “How’s it going?” The runner confidently said “Great! I’m running at world record pace”.  Chet inquisitively replied “World record pace, huh?”  The runner answered “Yep.  My world. My record. My pace.”

Yep.  That’s what running is all about, isn’t it?  Creating your own world – your own goals to reach, your own mountains to climb…your own personal milestones.

Ok.  Enough chatter.  Time to get back to work.

There’s someone in my future waiting for me to make her proud.

***

“The woods are lovely dark and deep, but I have promises to keep,
and miles to go before I sleep,
and miles to go before I sleep.”
– Robert Frost

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11

Mar. ’13

Letter to my Shin. No, seriously.

Dear Shin Splint,

Ok, we need to talk.

I’ve managed to run for almost a year now without ever knowing what the heck you even were.  And I was fine with that.  I heard people talk about you.  Heard a lot about you actually.  Heard you were a troublemaker.  Heard you were hard to beat.  But I hadn’t had the pleasure of meeting you yet.  I guess I figured you were too busy bothering everyone else to have time to visit me.

Ok, so I was wrong.

(That’s happened maybe once before in my life.  Ok, twice.)

But let me explain something to you.  I have no better way of saying this than to borrow some words of wisdom from none other than the great contemporary philosopher, Beyonce:

“You must not know bout me.”

Do you have any idea how important running is to me?  And how intent I am upon continuing to do it?  Psssh, dude, you can’t even touch my level of determination.  Many before you have tried.  My right knee is laughing at you as we speak.  He has been trying to stop me from Day 1, and he knows he doesn’t stand a chance.  My brain?  Whew.  That chick has you beat all day, every day, and twice on Tuesday.  She has told me SO many times that I’m not good enough to do this.  That I’m not strong enough, that I’m not “this” enough, that I’m not “that” enough.  She has absolutely begged me at times not to get out there and run.  But nope.  Even She hasn’t succeeded.

Because I have something that overpowers all of you.

My Heart.

Oh, honey, let me tell you about my Heart.  That girl is fierce.  She has taken a beating, been ripped in two, and has some mornings felt so heavy inside me that I felt like I couldn’t even get out of bed, much less go for a 4-mile run.  But no matter how exhausted, sad, and lonely She may be, She always – without fail – manages to whisper in my ear, “We can do this.”

“Get up.  Get out there.  WE can do this.”

And even with her little whisper, she speaks more loudly than you or any of your other troublemaker friends can even imagine.  She is who I choose to listen to.  She never ever lets me down.  She’s strong.  She’s tough.  She’s unstoppable.

So, I’m going to keep running.  See this?

shinsplintblog

This kind of thing is just too good for me to pass up.  You tag along if you want to, but you’re not going to stop me.  It’s too late for me to turn back now.  I’m in this for the long haul.

Hey – nice try, though.

Sincerely,

Running is Hard Enough Without Your Help, Go Away

***

“Find a place inside where there’s joy,
and the joy will burn out the pain.”
Joseph Campbell

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09

Mar. ’13

Stronger

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This is the back of the shirt that my son and I got at a 5k race we ran in this morning in honor of Leigh Cooper Wallace, a local hero who passed away a few months ago from complications resulting from pneumonia.  As the race director described it, this was a race “in memory of her compassion and generosity, her service to this community, her incredible strength, her support of young athletes, and her encouragement for all people to pursue a healthy lifestyle.”  They put together this first annual race to honor the “incredible example she set, so that we may continue to live life as fully as she did.”

I didn’t have the pleasure of knowing Leigh Cooper Wallace personally, but I can’t help but be influenced by the example she set.  She went through a lot in her short lifetime (most notably being that she was a kidnap/rape survivor), and she used her story to teach others to become fighters – to not let circumstances defeat you, no matter how tempting it might be to give up.

I couldn’t help but be aware of the timing of this race for me personally.

Although I am doing great and getting tougher every day, I do still have my moments.  I’ve had a rough couple of months.  I’ve lost more than one friend to various circumstances, including my very best friend who I miss every single day, and that’s not something that is very easy to bounce back from.  But I’ve been trying.  And as part of the trying, I’ve been pushing myself harder with my running.  If you’re not a runner, it’s hard to explain to you what running does to you.  I know there’s something chemical to it – endorphins and whatnot.  But it’s more than that.  So much more.  It’s a way to measure your ability to endure.  To teach yourself not to give up just because things start getting a little tough – but to push through.  Push through.  Even when you think you can’t keep going, you can.  Yes, there are going to be tough spots and yes, you may have to allow yourself to slow down a little to make it.  But you will make it. Push through.  Endure. Stay strong.

So, not only did I proudly run today with those thoughts in my mind, but I managed to achieve my own personal record.  I’m not a fast runner, by any stretch of the imagination, but I was a lot faster today than the old me ever was.  I managed to fall under the 30-minute mark and ran the race in 29:42.  It has been my goal for a very long time to break 30 minutes and I did it today – on one of of the toughest 5k courses I’ve ever run.

So, how about that?  Here I am.  My first race in this “new life” and I’m starting off with a bang.

Turns out I really am stronger than I think.   Thank you for the reminder, Leigh.

***

“As I get older I see that running has changed for me.  What used to be about burning calories is now more about burning up what is false.  Lies I used to tell myself about who I was and what I could do, friendships that cannot withstand hills or miles, the approval I no longer need to seek and solidarity that cannot bear silence.  I run to burn up what I don’t need and ignite what I do.”
~ Kristin Armstrong

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*Note: Here’s a link if you’d like to read more about what an amazing woman Leigh Cooper Wallace was: 

http://www2.wataugademocrat.com/News/story/Local-runner-coach-Leigh-Wallace-dies-id-009923

Posted by . Categories: Freestyle Writings/Musings, Running. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Leave a comment

28

Feb. ’13

Passion

passion

“Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.”
– Oprah Winfrey

Passion.

Don’t you just love that word?  Just saying it makes me happy.

(And no, I’m not getting ready to blog about romantic passion.  Blech.  If you noticed a few blogs ago, I’m checking that crap at the door for a while.)

No, this blog is about the good stuff.  Real passion.  Lasting passion.  The kind that once you truly discover it and recognize it, never ever goes away.  (Quite UN-like romantic passion, actually).  You can silence it at times, maybe even ignore it for a while, but it’s not gone.  Ever.  It’s always there waiting for you to pay attention to it, and to act on it.  And somehow you’re never truly satisfied until you do.

I’m talking about the things that move you.  The things that when you’re doing them, you’re transported away from everything else.  Other problems take a hike, and for a brief moment in time, you are fully and completely…YOU.

About a month ago, when I was going through some of the hardest, darkest times of my recent breakup and accompanying issues, I woke up one morning with an odd thought.  Rather than waking up sad like I had been for the few weeks prior (Man, I was such a big baby…), I actually woke up with a strong motivational thought.  Amid all the sadness and chaos, and seemingly out of nowhere, this thought dawned on me:  I am SO lucky to have passions.  And not even just one.  I act, I run, and I write.  And all three of those things are true passions.  They make me me.  When I’m doing any of them, I’m not worrying about anything else in my life.  I lose myself in them, and yet I find myself at the same time.  Strange how that works.

It’s so important to have those passions and to act on them.  If you’re reading this right now, I know something pops into your mind.  Maybe it’s not the same as mine.  Maybe yours is drawing. Or dancing. Or gardening. Or playing the ukulele – I don’t know.  But whatever it is – DO it!  Lose yourself!

Just do me a favor, okay?

Make sure you don’t fall into the trap that I’ve fallen into many many times in the past – don’t let another person become your passion.  That’s so so dangerous.  A quote by Joseph Addison on that topic:

“Admiration is a very short-lived passion that immediately decays upon growing familiar with its object.”

Romantic passions are temporary.  You can try with all your heart (trust me, I know), but they aren’t going to fill the void that exists in you for that true passion.  The one that is all about you.  That one that makes you feel complete, without the help of another human being.

Because, you see – the only person that will remain permanently in your life is you.

I’m not trying to be a Debbie Downer here with that statement.  Not at all.  Just trying to make you (and me) realize that if you’re going to pour your heart and soul into something…make sure it’s something concrete and stable.  Something that won’t unexpectedly disappear on you.  That can never be another human being.

And hey, I know I don’t know anything.  I’m floating around out here on this sea searching for life rafts just like the rest of you.  But I’ve noticed lately that the life rafts I start clinging to that don’t require the involvement of another person, those are the ones that seem to do the best job of keeping me afloat.  I guess what I’m trying to say here is that I’m discovering that my true refuge – my safe haven, if you will – is me.

And that’s kind of awesome when you think about it.  Because I know I am not going to let me down.

So.  Find your passions and do them.  Save yourself.

Right now.

Go!

***

Next time I’ll be braver
I’ll be my own savior
Standing on my own two feet.
– Adele, Turning Tables lyrics

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